A Parent's Serenity Prayer

Wow, look at me, another blog post!!

I was poking around the internet this morning and came across the below, which made me laugh uncontrollably by the way, and I immediately wanted to share it with all my parent friends!!

Parent’s Serenity Prayer

Someone, grant me the serenity
To accept that I cannot kill my children;
Courage to not scream uncontrollably;
And wisdom to know how to fix or replace things.

Living one moment at a time;
Enjoying one moment at a time;
Accepting broken furniture as a test;
Taking, as other parents before me, this crazy environment
As it is, and not how I dream it;
Trusting that somehow things will be okay
If I surrender to parenthood;
That I may enjoy the good times
And be supremely happy once they have children of their own
Forever returning the mayhem.
AMEN

To all my parent friends out there (and those who may not have children of their own, but who surrounded by them all day long), PEACE to you!

D


*prayer copied from http://www.divinecaroline.com/22117/93779-parent-s-serenity-prayer

Life with Three

As usual, I haven't blogged on a regular basis. As usual, this is gonna be a long one. So, grab a cup of Jo, get comfy and read away.

We welcomed our precious baby boy Dean William Clarence Puddicombe on July 10, 2010.

It was a crazy, scary, and fast delivery. I went in for a check on the baby, as they were set to induce me, but didn't have the room for me. After the check, the nurse noticed that I was having fairly regular contractions. This wasn't unusual for me, so I wasn't thinking that I was about to go naturally. The nurse asked if she could check me, and I hadn't changed at all since my appointment with my OB earlier on in the week. She then said for me to maybe take a walk and see if they progress any before I go home.

I didn't even last 5 minutes before I had to head back up to triage. 3.5 hours later, I was looking at my little man and crying at the site of him.

You see, Dean wasn't planned...and the pregnancy threw me for a loop and took my thoughts to places I never thought I would EVER think. Then when I laid eyes on him, it all hit me and I was instantly in love...and bawling my eyes out.

After the delivery I hemorrhaged very badly and passed out a few times. I don't remember much about this part. I hear it was pretty scary and they were prepping me for surgery when the on-call OB saved the day. The next day I did end up getting two blood transfusions, and let me tell you, NIGHT and DAY in regards to how I felt. It was amazing. I highly recommend it :) If only I could sign-up on a monthly basis for it!! The transfusion also made me realize how important it is to donate blood if you can, as often as you can. Unfortunately, I can't donate blood...never been able too because of my anemia. BUT, I encourage you to do it!!

As a result of the drama, I was in the hospital for a bit longer...but I was in the lovely hotel-like room, and was spoiled by the nurses...the first time EVER, that I actually could have stayed longer in a hospital!

Life with three has been AMAZING so far. I have LOVED the summer with all three of my children and Abi has been a huge part of the greatness of it all. She grew up so much since Dean's arrival, and has been a little miss mom to her siblings.

Currently we are in the process of potty training Emma. I can remember trying to do this with Abi. Obviously, Abi was successful in the PT stage, but I can remember thinking, "this kid is going to be 13 and in diapers!"...well, those thoughts are back, this time with Emma. "They" say that a child should be potty trained within 3-6 months from the time you start the training process (they, being so-called experts who I often wonder if they even have children). Let's just say, I will be happy if this kid is trained before kindergarten!

Emma has also entered the terrible two's with an absolute BANG! Miss Moose has her moments where I don't know who she is, or what she did with the original Emma version 1! She also doesn't seem to take to time-outs like abi did. She actually laughs! I take things away from her, and it doesn't even phase her. I tell her no, and she smiles, says "ohtay", then proceeds to do it again with an evil grin that says "come on, I dare you"...which ends in her on the stairs for a two-minute time out, where she sings, giggles and laughs at the wall. I am in SOOOOO much trouble when this girl decides to figure out where she stands in life! I'm seeing late night phone calls for help, possible police visits, lots of principle office visits, and LOTS of white hair, in my future.

Abi is doing amazing. Her treatment for her ADHD is wonderful! We have our little issues each morning before she takes her pill, and at night when the medication has worn off...but once that medication is in her system, my angel appears! She has improved so much in school, and continues to do so. Her reading level is now at par with her grade level, and her spelling and math are approaching. None of this would be happening of course if it weren't for the amazing love and support that we receive from her school. They have been understanding, patient, and have brought in extra help when/where needed.

Before the school year ended last year, I was sitting in a meeting with abi's learning resource teacher, a psychologist, and speech therapist, discussing abi's progress and future needs, and I was overwhelmed at the fact that these people were here for my child. They wanted her to succeed as much as I do. They care and love her! they took time to get to KNOW my child. She's not just some number to be lost to them. Case in point: the psychologist was removed from Abi's plan at the end of school year, but I received a phone call from her just to see how Abi was doing. She didn't have to do that. She certainly is busy enough to not do that...but she still did. When the speech therapist was asking about Abi's past, Abi's resource teacher was answering the questions EXACTLY how I would!

I have to say, it is so nice to see people actually come to realize ADHD as a disease. That a child isn't "dumb" or won't amount to anything...but that they just need extra time and care to reach their full and glorious potential. It's awesome to have such support and understanding. It's nice to see educators not use ADHD as an excuse to ignore, or as an excuse at all (well, she has ADHD, so this is as good as she is going to be, be thankful she can even finish her alphabet!)...it's nice to see Abi encouraged AND challenged!

Dean is three months old now. He is so big, and so perfect. His smile lights up the room, and he can giggle from his toes up...just like his sisters. He still isn't in his crib, but I actually think I get more sleep with him beside me than I would if he was in his crib. I don't sleep deeply, but I do get the entire night to just lay there. He is now almost 14lbs, and is 24 inches tall (2 whole feet) - all this puts him in the 90th percentile on the growth chart for his age. Like I said, big boy.

It's crazy, but life seems easier with the three. I seem to have more energy than I have ever had in my adult life. I guess you are just WAY more relaxed by the time the third arrives, that you no longer stress over small things. Plus, not having to go into work each day probably helps!

When I was pregnant with Emma, we had my parents over for dinner and we ordered in Chinese food, which came with fortune cookies. We all opened our cookies and read our fortunes out loud. Billy's fortune made us laugh, and it's been on our kitchen fridge ever since. Each day, I look at it and grin...okay, to be honest, some days I look at it, glare and say "ya, okay"...but by the end of those days, I do end up grinning.

I leave today's post with that fortune:

"Children will contribute to your cheerfulness".

For us, this fortune is times three...and I am so very thankful and grateful for each one!

To those I love, peace.

D

Abigailism 2010

Haven't blogged an Abigailism in a while! Last night was a doozey, I couldn't pass this one up to post.

It's 10:30pm and Abi is STILL up. I tell her to come and sleep on the floor in our room (no toys in our room to keep her busy). Billy has been sleeping for a while now, since he has to leave at an hour in the morning that I don't even recognize as real time. Abi lays down and starts to pretend snore...

mommy: Abi, pretending to sleep WILL NOT make mommy think you are actually asleep!
abi: but mommy, I have a cold, I can't help it, I can't breathe!
mommy: then maybe you should put another pillow down under your head.
abi: I don't have another one mom. I have daddy's shirt though and it's under my head.
mommy: k, mommy is going to pass to you her pregnancy pillow to put under your head then okay?
abi: okay.

a few seconds go by...

abi: mom?
mom: what abigail?!
abi: this won't make me preg-a-net will it?
mom: (laughing) no sweetheart, it won't.
abi: phew!

Happy 2010!

Do you remember 1999? I sure do. It was the year before I got married...but also the year of the Y2K hype! Looking back now, what a laugh. The entire world in a panic over the earth stopping...planes falling out of the sky; stock market crashing; computers not working; etc...oh the overtime that was put in to ensure that January 1, 2000 went off without a hitch!! Now, here we are, January 1, 2010. Seems like a page out of some space novel, except we aren't flying in the sky with our cars, or living anything like the Jetson's did.

2009 was a good year. Every year is a good year as long as I am surrounded by my family and friends who I love! We had a few dips here and there as far as health went, but we got through it (getting through it), and God has shown us his mercy and love, time and time again. It was also a year wrapped around my darling Abi.

In January I noticed that Abi was quite thin. She has always been slender, but this time she was all bone. I put her on the scale and she was 36 pounds (which for a 6 year old is little). I had always raised my concerns to her doctor about her weight, and about how she would go DAYS without food, and he would always shake his finger at me and tell me I was over-reacting. Well, when I saw the bones, and then saw the 36 pounds flash at me, I decided it was time to get a second opinion!

I took her to my doctor who then referred her to another pediatrician in the city. It was amazing to have a doctor actually listen to my concerns and try to put my mind at ease. One of the things that Abi had been diagnosed with was Acid Reflux. Her doctor, after talking with me for a long time, asking me about her as a baby, etc., determined that one of the reasons why Abi didn't eat, was that it was actually very painful for her to eat. He thinks that she has had A.R. since she was born, so she's had 6 years to associate pain with food. We put her on some medication for that, and for the first time in 6 years, I saw my daughter EAT! I mean ACTUALLY EAT! Not just a bite here, and there, but clean off her plate and ask for more! It was amazing, and so nice to see!

BUT, it didn't last long. After about three weeks, she went back to her old habits. Her doctor then did an x-ray of her tummy and discovered she was severely backed-up. We needed to treat the constipation before we could continue on with the Acid Reflux medication....we are STILL working on the constipation. Part of that has to do with another diagnosis...

In consultation with Abi's school, I had asked for an assessment on her concentration levels. I had noticed at home that it was getting more and more difficult to get Abi to focus on one thing for more than 2 minutes, and I wondered if she was like that at school as well. The school brought in a Psychologist who worked with abi for about 6 months. At the end of the school year, Abi had to undergo a test to make sure that she wasn't suffering from "absent seizures"...when that test came back saying that she wasn't suffering from that, she underwent further observation, and has finally, officially been diagnosed with ADHD. This is connected with the constipation because Abi can't sit still long enough to let her bowls do their thing!!

Problem with ADHD is that the medication that is out there...all of them...the #1 side effect is weight loss. Which, obviously Abi can't afford.

In September, Abi's weight had finally gotten back up to 42.5 pounds. We were thrilled. Then flu season hit, and Abi lost a pound and a half. Nothing too concerning. But, she was then diagnosed with ADHD and we decided to put her on a two-week trial. The trial ended this past week, and she has lost another 2 pounds, putting her down to 39 pounds. Her doctor however, is not concerned yet, and wanted to give the medication a month trial with the school. So, we play the waiting game.

It's hard because Abi is at that age where school can either be an enjoyable experience, or not. If you add a learning disability on top of that, it makes it even harder to enjoy. I want so much for her to enjoy learning, and I worry about the struggle she faces every day! So, now I pray and turn it over to God, and hope that this medication works wonders, and that her weight evens out.

She goes in for her monthly weigh-in on January 29th...I pray that her weight either stays the same or even goes up!

Emma spent the year turning into a little devil! Seriously. She is cute as a button, and she will make you laugh till you cry...but man, she is going to cause trouble! I thought I was in for it with Abi...Abi is sweet as punch compared to our Moose...or Bull. BUT, she really makes you smile from the inside out! Emma is always there to greet you with a smile and a "hi". I've really been blessed with two amazing daughters. I never thought it possible to love as much as I love my girls.

I have a girlfriend who would ask me, "so, who do you like more?"...and I would joke and say back, "Emma, cuz she can't talk back yet!"...but honestly, and this is something that only parents with more than one child can fully understand and grasp, I like and love them both EXACTLY the same! I never thought that possible. I always thought parents were full of crap when they said stuff like that. BUT, it's so true. Each child has their own uniqueness about them that makes you love them differently, but as far as more or less goes, that just doesn't exist. You love both the same. Make sense?

Well, enough about the kids. Last year I wrote about my resolutions that I had made the year before, and how I did with them. Well, continuing on with that little tradition, here is what I said for 2009:

#1 - Pay down the one credit card we have and then start to save.
Ha ha ha ha ha ha...save? what is the meaning of this word "save"?

#2 - Lose weight - about 50 pounds worth.
Well, by March of 2009, the amount actually went to 60 pounds to lose!!! BUT, since July 16th, I have lost 34 of those pounds. 26 more to go.

#3 - Work on my Faith and Trust in God more. Work on forgiveness, worrying, and patience...learn how to hand it over to Him.
This, I think will be a life-long resolution...a daily one. God did however answer a prayer that I had been praying for over 10 years on - regarding forgiving a particular individual in my life!!

#4 - Continue to accept what life brings and go with the flow of it.
I probably should have read this, oh, about 4 weeks ago! Life gave me a doosey, and it's taken me a while to "go with the flow" of it :)

#5 - To Reconnect with family members that I had lost connection with.
Isn't Facebook AWESOME. Thanks to Facebook, it's soooo much easier to gain and re-gain that connection. It's so nice to be a click away from family.

#6 - To make a plan on how to cope with going back to work (housework, laundry, abi's school work, family time, etc.).
Plan? what's that? There was no plan. Only worry (FAIL for #3). However, it all seems to get done and we are adjusting well...thanks of course to my amazing hubby, whom without, I would be buying us clean underwear every Sunday!!

#7 - Get my smile back.
It's back and it's great!

My resolutions for 2010?

• Deepen my relationship with God. Set aside time each day for prayer and devotional. I pray everyday, all the time, but I don't have a designated time to just be alone with God...I could really use that.
• Lose the remaining 26 pounds.
• Be more patient (or, well, patient period) with my children.
• Be more trusting of God.
• Learn the meaning of SAVE $$.
• Laugh once a day.

So, to those I love, I wish you a fabulous 2010 that is full of laughter, love, joy, peace and great memories. May 2010 be one that is healthy and happy!

D:)

Abilgailism...

Abi: Mom, I don't like growing up anymore.
Mom: How come?
Abi: Cuz, before you know it, I will get older and older and then really old, like 16.