Back at it...

My mat leave has come to an end.

Anxiety has slowly been creeping up on me this past month, as Monday, June 8th approaches. We've had a couple of Daycare visits, and I know Emma will be fine. Today, she probably wouldn't even have noticed if I wasn't there. So the only person we need to worry about is me!

When we left Daycare today (after a 40 minute visit), I felt fine. Things were good. I still have the rest of today, and the whole weekend after all! But as I got half-way home, the tears came!! Oi Vay...Monday is going to be brutal!

I love being a mom. My kids and my family come first in my life, and I make no qualms about it. I have made, and will continue to make, decisions in my life that put my family forefront. There is NO career out there wonderful enough, NO amount of money or things that can beat it, NO house, NO vehicle, NO friend that can beat it. Those who know me well, know that if faced with a decision between anything and my family...there won't even be a second of hesitation, my family will be chosen. I HATE the fact that i have to work. Absolutely, positively, HATE IT! BUT, I gotta, and thankfully God has blessed me with an amazing place to work.

The rest of the way home, between sobs, the words "I can do all things through him" kept repeating itself in my head over and over again. I've put Emma down for her afternoon nap, and I looked up that verse...then I read the entire chapter.

I felt compelled to share, and it's my hope that those of you out there, who need some reassurances in life, can gain some encouragement like I did through these words taken from Philippians 4: 4-13:

"Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice! Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near. Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.

Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things. Whatever you have learned or received or heard from me, or seen in me—put it into practice. And the God of peace will be with you.

Indeed, you have been concerned, but you had no opportunity to show it. I am not saying this because I am in need, for I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do everything through him who gives me strength."

It is sooooo much easier to be angry with the hand that you've been dealt (in my case that I have to work for living, and not be home for my kids ALL the time), but the key is to be content, and to be content you need to focus on the good things in your life, and praise God for them...then you will be content, happy, and you will be able to get through any circumstance that comes your way.

I am blessed. I know I am. I have a great job, and an amazing, patient, understanding boss. I am working 4 days a week and have been given the opportunity to work from home one of those days so that I can be home more. I need to be thankful for that...and I am.

Love and peace to you all,

D:)